No, I was offended by the "warning" prior to the first Simpons episode:
"This episode contains discussion of same sex marriages. Viewer discretion is advised."
Whoa, hold the phone there. You mean, there is no viewer discretion for Bart being a completely rude degenerate? For Homer's child abuse and mysogynist behavior? For Lisa's overacheivment? For Marge's steady retrograde to the days of 50's housewives in pearls and high heels vaccuuming the carpet? (I love the Simpsons, so don't send my hate mail. I'm just proving a point here people, and if you can't get it, screw you. And the horse you rode in on. And your momma. That's right, your momma.)
This is the same channel that had a live video of an alien autopsy, for God's sake! They pay women to be gold-digging, heart-breaking sluts for prime-time. They signed a contract with Paris Hilton. Their list of human rights violations goes on and on, and yet we are being warned that this episode talks about same-sex marriage?
So, I called my mom, who is normally a very intelligent and forward-thinking woman. The problem: Fox News and the Atkin's diet. There is a terrible correlation between the two. Carbohydrates are brain food, the nectar of the grey matter. The Atkin's diet prescribes less carbs (my mom's on 30 a day) to discourage weight gain and promote weight loss. Less carbs = less brains. I believe the Fox News people either a) saw this coming and planned accordingly or b) invented the Atkin's diet and planned accordingly. Suddenly, there's this new news station and it shoots up to the top of the news ratings at the same time that much of America is eating less brain food.
Mom's been on the Atkin's diet for 5 years now, and her love and respect for Fox News have grown exponentially while her intellect and deductive reasoning skills have dwindled to the point of nonexistence. What did Mom say when I called and complained about the aforementioned warning label? Paraphrased:
"You know I don't like censorship, but when you have a cartoon, children are going to be drawn to it. When you talk about issues that are adult issues, issues that kids don't need to see, you should have a warning so kids aren't necessarily exposed to it."Whoa. I swear she wasn't like this when I was growing up. Can you hear the atrophied brain cells crying, begging for nourishment? When did repecting other people no matter who they are become an "adult issue?" Why did all my books as a kid end with the moral of "love everyone for who they are" if that's not kids stuff? More importantly, where are your kids going to learn tolerance if not from you? And why aren't you involved in what your kids are watching? My mom never let me just watch whatever I wanted. She made me cover my eyes during "love scenes" until I was 12.
Besides, ratings and warning labels mean nothing, or close enough to it. PG-13 still allows hell, damn, and shit, and gives us erotica like the garage sex in The Fast and the Furious. Plus, PG-13 movies can have alcohol and drug use, something that 13 year olds should definitely be kept away from, and I speak from experience here. My point is, that is a ridiculous warning to be on the episode. You should watch things with your kids to monitor their media intake; they'll probably ask you questions about stuff they don't understand, rather then their friends, and it will be so much easier to warp their little minds into carbon copies of you. Just think, no brainwashing to remove the stain of independence from their impressionable little minds. So watch objectionable stuff with your kids.
(Thanks to Chambers for the title.)
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